And to be fully honest, I've been dreading this part. It's the one moment during our wedding that made me sad...and humiliated...and a lot of other emotions that I'm not sure I have the words for.
Okay, like a band-aid.
So after we enjoyed our delicious mini-pies, it was time for our first dance. As I'm sure all of you know, this is the point when typically the DJ introduces the couple under their new married name and invites everyone to watch as they have their moment on the dance floor. This is the time when everyone stops what they are doing, turns toward us and listens as the DJ begins to speak.
To make sure everyone is up-to-speed, my name is Melanie (as seen on our pie flags...I'm not worried about you all knowing my name). :) Please keep in mind my name when reading the next part.
As I'm standing there, holding my new husband's hand and loving life more than I thought possible...the DJ says "And now, if I can have everyone's attention. The bride and groom will have their first dance as husband and wife. I'm pleased to announce Frogger and Melissa NewLastName."
Yes, you read that correctly - he called me Melissa. Melissa NewLastName.
There was an audible gasp that swept through the entire group as all eyes were on us. It was humiliating and embarrassing and I literally wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear. I realize this sounds a bit dramatic but honestly, I had been waiting to hear this introduction and to be announced with a completely different name, it was like I was just hit by a MACK truck.
The situation was made worse by the reactions all around us. Some looked on in shock, others yelled out my actual name and well, there were even a couple of chuckles. I don't hold it against anyone...well, anyone except the DJ.
After hearing my actual name being yelled out, the DJ corrected himself and immediately played our first dance song to help move things along. At the time, as a defense mechanism, I pretended to not even hear it - looking around at people saying "what? what happened?" but yeah, I heard it loud and clear and yeah, it cut pretty deep.
At that point, Frogger was leading me out to the dance floor and my options were to stand there and have a meltdown or take the moment in stride and focus on what mattered - that moment I was going to have my first dance with my husband. I chose the latter.
Once I made the decision to live in that moment with him and soak up our first dance, I felt so much better in his arms, listening to the song and allowing myself to let it go. Looking back through those pictures, I'm so glad I made that conscious choice. I'll never get to change the outcome of that moment but I did get to change my reaction and even now, I have to remind myself of that. While writing this, I'm still a bit torn up about it but I know that it's a very small thing to have gone wrong in the big scheme and I couldn't feel more lucky to have had so many of the moments before and after go so well.
Thank you all for making me feel comfortable enough to share this humiliating moment with you. I could have easily brushed past it but after sharing my journey with you and all of my trials and tribulations, I feel like it's only right to share everything with you.
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